| Chris 'Rocked' |
[27 Feb 2005|11:56pm] |
One of the best things the United States unveiled to me was/is a taste of Afro-American standup comedy. Nobody does standup comedy like Chris Rock or Dave Chappelle, ok maybe we can give Robin Williams a honorary membership in the Afro-American comedy club, but no Adam Sandlers or Mike Myerss in here(they are all good comedians, but not exactly my type). And that is the reason I found myself glued to the TV to watch Oscars live for the first time in my life - Chris Rock hosting the Oscars. Boy o boy, the man just rocked. Wish they had Fedexed the Oscar statues to the winners and given the MC more time to unleash his verbal mockery of this hypocratic world, Jude Law and all things in between.(He didn't spare himself either).
As a bonus my favorite director in the whole wide world took home the Best Director and Best Film Oscars, not bad.
Chris's Life in his own words from his book, Rock This(above picture is the jacket cover of the same)
Feb 7, 1966, 10 am: Rose Rock gives birth to what she thinks is a boy and names him Chris. Later that same day Rose goes back to her job as wipe-up girl at Rico's Hog Slaughtering Factory. Rico congratulates Rose and gives her a free bag of snouts.
July 20, 1971 age 5: Chris takes first step(Life really is slower in South).The next day, good news and bad news. Good news-Chris takes his second step. Bad New-Its off a dock and he's almost killed and eaten by killer catfish.
April 3, 1973 age7: Chris utters his first words: "No one makes a better rum cake than Haile Selassie."
October 31, 1974 age 8: Chris goes to Halloween Ball and wins 200$ worth of boiled peanuts as first prize for his Grits Man get-up. He's happy but it takes him two months to get the costume out of his hair.
September 12, 1981 age 15: After much deliberation, Chris elects to continue his education and enters fourth grade.
March 4, 1983 age 17: Chris loses his virginity to an albino goat. Later, Chris embarrassed: he discovers the goat lied to him, claiming only to be "light skinned."
June 27, 1985 age 19: Chris spends a night in the hoosegow after getting into a brawl at a Charlie Pride concert.
August 14, 1990 age 24: Chris gets job installing hand blowers in outhouses, a career with a promising future.
January 13, 1992 age 25: Chris enters a talent show as a comedian but loses to Uncle Mikey.
Rock on Chris (and you too Senor Eastwood)!
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